Ideas

March 12, 2025

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Are you looking to build a new website or revamp an existing one in 2025? One of the first things to consider is the cost of web development services. The price can vary greatly depending on several factors, from the development team’s location and experience to the project’s complexity and scope. In this article, we’ll take a closer look at the average hourly rates for web development services in 2025, the factors that can affect the cost of a website project, and some tips for budgeting for ongoing maintenance and support. So, let’s dive in and find out exactly how much you can expect to pay for web development services in 2025.

The Average Hourly Rates for Web Development Services in 2025

In 2025, the average hourly rate for web development services can range anywhere from $20 to $150 per hour, depending on the development team’s location, their experience level, and the specific technologies and tools required for the project.

Ukraine, Poland, and Belarus are some of the best countries to hire offshore developers. These countries offer some of the most affordable hourly rates for web development services, ranging from $20 to $50 per hour.

In addition to the location of the development team, the specific technologies and tools required for the project can also affect the hourly rate for web development services. For example, developers with expertise in more specialized technologies such as React JS or Node JS may have a higher hourly rate than those with expertise in more standard and widely-used technologies such as PHP or HTML/CSS.

The Cost of a Website Project: Basic vs Complex

Basic websites, also known as informational websites, are typically smaller in scope and are designed to provide basic information about a company or organization, such as contact information and a list of services. These types of websites can often be built for as little as $1,000 to $5,000.

On the other hand, complex websites are typically larger in scope and may include features such as e-commerce functionality, custom databases, and advanced user interfaces. These types of websites can often cost anywhere from $5,000 to $50,000 or even higher, depending on the specific requirements and features included.

When determining the cost of a website project, it’s essential to consider the specific needs of your business and the types of features and functionality necessary for your website to succeed. While a basic website may be sufficient for some companies, others may require a more complex solution to meet their needs fully.

Savvy Strategies for Cutting Costs on Web Development in 2025

Web development can be a significant expense for any business, but there are ways to save money without compromising on quality. Here are 6 tips to help you cut costs when developing a website or application.

  1. Have a clear plan and scope of work: Define your project’s requirements, goals, and objectives before beginning development. This will help you identify the features and functionalities that are essential to your project and avoid unnecessary costs. I recommend you write a web design brief which is a document that outlines the specifics of a website design and development project.
  2. Use open-source software: Leverage open-source software, such as WordPress, Joomla, or Drupal, to reduce the development cost.
  3. Outsource to a cost-effective location: Outsourcing web development to countries such as Ukraine or Poland can be cost-effective and save you money on development costs.
  4. Use pre-designed templates and themes: Using pre-designed templates and themes can save you time and money on design costs.
  5. Avoid customizing unnecessary features: Only customize features that are essential to your project. Customizing unnecessary features will add to development costs.
  6. Use a project management tool: Using a project management tool to keep track of progress and timelines can save you money on development costs.

Factors That Affect the Cost of Web Development Services

Here are 8 factors that can affect the cost of web development services:

  1. Location of the development team: The cost of living and average wages in a given location can affect the hourly rate for web development services. Generally, web development services in countries with a higher cost of living, such as the US and Europe, tend to be more expensive than those in countries with a lower cost of living.
  2. The development team’s level of experience and expertise: Developers with more experience and expertise may charge a higher hourly rate for their services. On the other hand, full-stack web developers can spend less time on a project and provide more quality services that are essential for enterprise web projects.
  3. Specific technologies and tools required for the project: Projects that require specialized knowledge and experience in certain programming languages or frameworks may have a higher hourly rate compared to those that use more common and widely-used technologies.
  4. Project complexity and scope: The complexity and scope of the project can affect the amount of time and resources required to complete it, which can, in turn, affect the cost.
  5. Design and branding: The cost of web development services can be affected by the cost of design and branding elements, such as the cost of creating a custom logo, selecting color schemes and layouts, and other visual elements that are unique to the project.
  6. Third-party integrations: The cost of web development services can be affected by the cost of integrating third-party tools or services, such as payment gateways, analytics, and other features that are not included in the core development services.
  7. The level of customization required: Customized solutions will require more time and resources to develop, resulting in higher costs.
  8. The need for SEO and marketing: Implementing an SEO strategy and a marketing plan can add to the development costs. This may include optimizing website structure, content, and meta tags for search engines, building backlinks, developing an ongoing content marketing strategy to improve search engine rankings, and developing a marketing strategy to increase visibility and attract users to the website.

Budgeting for Ongoing Maintenance and Support in Web Development Services

Website maintenance is essential to keeping your online presence up to date and running smoothly. The cost of website maintenance can vary greatly depending on your website type and the level of maintenance required. In this case, we will explore the different types of websites and the corresponding maintenance costs you can expect to incur.

  1. Basic websites: These are simple websites that typically consist of a few pages, such as a home page, about us page, and contact page. The maintenance cost for these types of websites is usually low, averaging around $30 to $50 per month.
  2. E-commerce websites: These types of websites allow customers to purchase products or services online. The cost of maintenance for e-commerce websites is typically higher than basic brochure websites, averaging around $50 to $100 per month.
  3. Custom websites: Custom websites are tailored to a specific business or organization and often require more complex features and functionality. The cost of maintenance for custom websites can range from $100 to $200 per month.
  4. Content Management System (CMS) websites: CMS websites are built using platforms such as WordPress, Joomla, and Drupal. The maintenance cost for these types of websites can range from $50 to $100 per month.
  5. Social media websites: Websites that are focused on social media interactions, such as forums and message boards, require regular updates and maintenance to keep content fresh and users engaged. The maintenance cost for these types of websites can range from $50 to $150 per month.

It is important to note that these costs are approximate and can vary depending on the specific needs of your website. Additionally, getting a quote from a website maintenance company is always recommended before committing to a contract. By understanding the different types of websites and the corresponding maintenance costs, you can make an informed decision when it comes to maintaining your online presence.

Sum up

In conclusion, the cost of web development services can vary greatly depending on several factors, including the development team’s location and experience, the project’s complexity and scope, and the specific technologies and tools required. In 2025, the average hourly rate for web development services can range anywhere from $20 to $150 per hour. Basic websites can often be built for as little as $1,000 to $5,000, while complex websites can cost anywhere from $5,000 to $50,000 or even higher. 

To save money on web development costs, businesses can consider outsourcing to cost-effective locations, using open-source software and pre-designed templates and themes, and avoiding customizing unnecessary features. It is also essential to have a clear plan and scope of work before beginning development and use a project management tool to keep track of progress and timelines.

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Jeremiah

News, Stories

Gleaming Presence of Tremendous Communications Shining an Iridescent Light on AAPI

Jeremiah Abraham, the founder and CEO of Tremendous Communications, had bumps in the road in getting to where he is today. Starting his business right before the pandemic, he doubted the path that he created and considered quitting everything that he was doing. But with mentors along his side and his determination to uplift the AAPI community, his company has contributed to protecting and celebrating the Asian American and Pacific Islander communities when they needed it the most.

Working at renowned companies like Disney and Warner Bros., Jeremiah has spent years hustling at the intersection of technology and entertainment. Using his talent in marketing, he has constantly shed light on the AAPI community by promoting films such as Everything Everywhere All At Once and co-producing the Filipino American musical drama film Yellow Rose. He still finds ways to balance work and life by tearing down the systematically ingrained notion of working from 9 to 5.

In this one hour interview, Jeremiah lays out his story of how he entered this industry, experiencing ignorant approaches to different cultures in a white dominant workplace, and his immense passion for AAPI representation.

Blend of Tech and Entertainment

I got my degree in computer engineering from UC Irvine and that was when I needed to decide what I wanted to do in life. I wanted to make a difference in technology back then, so I got that degree. One of my first jobs was in the aerospace industry. I was working there and I realized that I was just really bad at math. I didn’t think I could realistically pursue this as a long-term career. It was one of those moments where you had to have this introspective, realization, or catharsis about what you thought you were going to be and what you want in life.

Then I found this blend of tech and entertainment, which I was always interested in. I ended up being a front-end developer for Disney, which was a nice blend of the programming skills that I learned from school and the entertainment brands that I’ve always admired. Social media was still fairly new at these companies. This was back in 2007, and I would say that the biggest leap from this tech world to this communications world was when I discovered a Master’s program for Digital Social Media and Online Communities at USC. So I worked at Disney full-time, and at night I tried to get my master’s degree. I knew in my head what I wanted to build for myself and that was this intersection.

An intersection of my interest in engineering and social dynamics is interesting because a lot of people didn’t know why I even majored in computer engineering and minored in sociology. Engineers build societies, but you can’t build it without understanding it first. I ended up pursuing this even more and realized that I had a knack for marketing which I ended up pursuing after receiving my degree at USC.

Uplifting the Filipino Community

After I got my master’s degree, I decided to pursue my thesis project as a full-on business venture, which was an online community and editorial group for Filipino Americans called BakitWhy.com. Uplifting the Filipino community has always been a constant in my life. Since high school, I was part of a Filipino club where we celebrated our culture and volunteered for Filipino community organizations. I knew that whatever I did, whether it was engineering or marketing, was in the service of our people.

So I started this website and it was one of the first, if not the first, Filipino American digital destinations for editorial and news content. We were covering events and a new emerging digital identity among the Filipino American community. I called this the golden age of Filipino YouTubers back in 2007. These were the days of HappySlip, NinjaDrops, ndtitanlady, and more. We were able to rally this community both on the digital side and also offline to develop not just a thriving company and brand, but a lifestyle destination that people could relate to. I wanted to create something wonderful for us.

One of the things that I pride Tremendous on is that we’re not just there to engage the AAPI community as a business, but we primarily want to instill genuine progress and impact. We are immersed in our Asian American community. We don’t clock out after a certain time and say “Sorry we’re done today Asians, it’s five o’clock and we’re not going to do anything anymore.” No, this is our life. This is what fulfills us and I think it helps set our campaigns apart. The way we communicate and interact with our clients also influences the strategy we give to them because we’re not just looking at numbers, we’re looking at people. We are all about uplifting authentic Asian American experiences, diasporas, stories and narratives. For us not to be authentic with that presence in our daily lives would be hypocritical.

One of the things that I pride Tremendous on is that we’re not just there to engage the AAPI community as a business, but we primarily want to instill genuine progress and impact

– Jeremiah Abraham

Marketing in a White Dominant Setting

There was one instance where I was the only person of color in the room at a large entertainment company, still very green and inexperienced. I didn’t feel like I had the authority and the voice to chime in and redirect these senior leaders of this space. And they’re sitting around going like, “Hey, it’s February next month. It’s almost Black History Month. What can we do?” And then someone just started listing off all the movies in their catalog that had some resemblance of Black narrative. And I’m just like, “All right, well, that’s very top-level. But what more can we do? Can we bring in more people who actually represent this community in the room and have a conversation about it?” That situation really helped me realize that we needed to be part of that room of decision-makers. Being there that day sparked a drive in me that I’ll never forget.

One of the things that I had issues with while leading the publicity and marketing for Yellow Rose before we got acquired by Sony Pictures, was that people didn’t understand what Filipinos were, that our stories were relatable to all moviegoers, and that we were equally as valuable in Hollywood. People couldn’t wrap their brains around this and asked “Why is a Filipino family living in Texas? Do they really sing country music like that? Will non-Filipinos even relate to this?” They were seeing the Filipino diaspora within one specific lens instead of embracing the spectrum of the Filipino experience. They didn’t realize that there are mechanisms that historically pushed us to these areas that we’re thriving in, to these places where they may not think that there is a large thriving Filipino community. The lead characters are Filipino American, but the story is universal. If you took the lead characters out and made them Latinx or Black, for example, you would still have the same emotion. You’d still have the same humanity. You’d still have the same story. It just so happened that these people are Filipino. This is one of the things that Jo Koy discusses during his  interviews for Easter Sunday. The movie isn’t about Filipinos, it’s a movie about his family and his mom. That’s one of the biggest things I appreciated about this film. It’s a story for everyone.

The first movie that I ever saw when I moved to the United States was Superman 2 with my dad and that’s always ingrained in my head. I was in such awe of this superhero and I’ve always wondered how impactful it would have been if Superman was Filipino. That would have made such a big difference for me growing up. I love Christopher Reeve as Superman, but imagine if it was a Christopher Santos or a Christopher Dela Cruz in that heroic cape instead! Today I’m so happy that our next generation can enjoy seeing themselves as heroes with films like Shang-Chi and people like Iman Vellani as Kamala Kahn making a difference.

I think it’s incredibly important for us to make these decisions on how we are portrayed and valued for ourselves, with representation across every part of the process –  behind the camera, in front of the camera, in business and below the line. We can bring these little nuances of authenticity to these stories that are so important and help shape the next generation of folks who want to do this work. 

They were seeing the Filipino diaspora within one specific lens instead of embracing the spectrum of the Filipino experience. They didn’t realize that there are mechanisms that historically pushed us to these areas that we’re thriving in, to these places where they may not think that there is a large thriving Filipino community.

– Jeremiah Abraham

A Chronicle of Starting a Business Right Before a Pandemic

Starting a business at the cusp of a global pandemic was a big lesson in resilience. There is a lot of strategy, planning, introspection and decisions that need to be made behind the scenes. I had been planning Tremendous for years. I spent so much time creating the structure of it, the business strategy, forecasting our trajectory and all those things that you need to help lay the foundation of a business… then the pandemic hit and I needed to shift very quickly.

Tremendous incorporated in 2019 and started to plant the seeds of studio partnerships. When we were ready to sign a couple of contracts, all the major movie studios suddenly shut down. I had to take a step back and I realized the mission of Tremendous is not rooted in movies and entertainment, but it exists to uplift the visibility of Asian Americans as a whole. We couldn’t work in entertainment at the time but that didn’t stop us from working within the community. That’s when we helped support Racism is a Virus, and co-founded Unapologetically Asian and CollaborAzian. We used our expertise to help uplift Stop AAPI Hate. We were able to leverage our network and our skills and our desire to make change in this very crucial moment of the Asian American community.

There certainly were many surprises along the way. I pitched this movie that was supposed to come out on January 2021. We were ready! We put this beautiful deck together, we brainstormed, we strategized. And then they told me, “Hey, we’re going to make an announcement today that this movie is going to be pushed to January 2022.” I was like, “What am I going to do for a year?” It’s a lot of those things that I learned as an entrepreneur that it doesn’t necessarily go how you forecast, even though you spend so much time strategizing and pulling numbers. And that’s fine because that will push you to be more dynamic as a business and help you imagine new, creative avenues for yourself. But for me, it was a lesson in resilience, being flexible, and not beating yourself up too much for things that are outside of your control.

I had to take a step back and I realized the mission of Tremendous is not rooted in movies and entertainment, but it exists to uplift the visibility of Asian Americans as a whole.

– Jeremiah Abraham

Confinements that Pull us Back

There were many moments where that lingering voice of doubt made me wonder if this was the right path for me. Should I go back to a safe, stable job with benefits and a retirement plan? What if I end up losing all my money in this venture? Is it okay that I decided not to work today?

Even now, I can make my own schedule. I can wake up at noon if I wanted to and keep working until 2:00 am or just take a random afternoon off. And that’s my choice to make. But because I’ve been so conditioned to think that the limits of my brain power need to be confined between nine to five, having this new freedom came with a sense of guilt.

I have such a hard time realizing that you don’t need to operate within those confines to be productive and successful and fulfilled. I just have to keep reminding myself that it’s okay to permit yourself to watch Netflix for an hour at 2:00 pm for you to refocus and recenter. It’s okay that you’re sleeping in until 11:00 am or 12:00 pm today because you worked until 1:00 am last night. I have to keep reminding myself that nobody is telling you what you need to do except for yourself. That’s the life of an entrepreneur and I’m still learning how to adjust to this new level of control, even today.

Shining Leadership Skills for Better Productivity

Throughout the years, I have applied my learning lessons in leadership – especially with how I lead my team and how I conduct business. Sometimes we have many projects to work on at the same time, sometimes we have less. I’ve always told my team, as long as you get your stuff done and you are communicative and responsive, then I’m good with that.

I really encourage them to explore their interests, experience life and bring those experiences back to the company. This helps bring fresh, new ideas during our brainstorms and campaigns. One of the things that I took away from working as a Marketing Director at Condé Nast is that they encouraged you to go travel. Travel changes you, it opens up your mind. It allows you to experience new things so you can bring that experience back into your editorial piece or your marketing strategy.

I’ve never liked the idea that you need to clock in at 9:00 am every day or else you’re considered a bad employee. Just because I’m sitting there physically doesn’t mean I’m mentally there. I’ve never understood that kind of leadership where it’s more important to appease other people and make them feel better about themselves because of your presence. It’s those antiquated expectations and older ways of doing business that I’m constantly reshaping for Tremendous. As long as we get our projects done, we don’t miss meetings, and our clients are happy… who cares if you sleep in an extra hour that day?

Travel changes you, it opens up your mind. It allows you to experience new things so you can bring that experience back into your editorial piece or your marketing strategy.

– Jeremiah Abraham

People that helped along the way

I never had one specific mentor during my career. Instead, I’ve had some amazing senior executives who have taught me different aspects of my leadership skills. One of them taught me negotiation skills, another taught me how to properly communicate my ideas in a meeting, another pushed me to be more assertive with what I need to succeed in a business setting. I’ve really taken these lessons and made them my own.

One of these executives is Terra Potts, who is the Executive Vice President of Worldwide Marketing at Warner Bros. Pictures. We kind of grew up at WB together back in the day. She taught me how to stand up for your worth in situations where people may not immediately see it. I take that into every negotiation that I am part of. Teal Newland, my Senior Vice President at Condé Nast Entertainment helped me hone my creative eye and incorporate different perspectives in my marketing campaigns. Diane Paragas, who is the director of Yellow Rose, mentored me in the filmmaking process. These are just some of the people who empowered me in my journey and I’m happy to give back to others who are working with me today.

Another friend of mine is Jose Antonio Vargas, who is the Founder of Define American. We had many check-ins during the pandemic and I told him straight up once that I was thinking about quitting because I didn’t know if I was doing the right thing. No studios hired me, no movies went out, the movies that were supposed to be in theaters were going out into streaming services. And it was hard for me to see what was coming down the line and the larger picture of it all. He gave me some tough love and said “Jeremiah, you’re building something that doesn’t currently exist. Obviously you’re going to run into these situations where the solution isn’t immediately there because you have to make it up for yourself.” I never thought about it that way. If the path has not always been taken, obviously you have the flexibility and the responsibility to forge a new one to create something that never existed before. That conversation inspired me to realize that I can’t hold myself to the same standard that I had before because I’m creating new standards for myself now. That helped shift my thinking and my perspective about it and, honestly, helped shape the development of Tremendous. I could have easily quit because of the pandemic, but I would have regretted it the rest of my life.

I would encourage people to pursue multiple avenues of mentorship. It was very valuable to me to learn from many very skilled individuals, not just one. And you never know where your new life lesson is going to come from or which experience you’re going to value for years to come. For me, it was the guidance of many people that helped me get to where I am today.

I can’t hold myself to the same standard that I had before because I’m creating new standards for myself now.

– Jeremiah Abraham

How to reach out

I am @jerabraham on Instagram and Twitter, and Tremendous is @tremendous_comm on all those platforms as well.

Interviewed by Tiff Soga

Image Sources: shopwithkendallyn.com, bfa.com

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Former Wacoal Marketing Executive Kristin DiCunzolo Leads Her Way For Lingerie Brand Lively As Newest CEO

Lingerie companies continue to operate in the same outmoded ways, but times have changed and the industry is ready for advancement and growth.

Despite the fact that the founder and current CEO of Lively, Michelle Cordeiro Grant is stepping down to manage the transition and assist with the company’s PR and brand partnerships.

Lively was founded in 2015 as a lingerie brand focused on comfort and style. New CEO, Kristin DiCunzolo, will be appointed to take charge of concentrating solely on the brand’s global growth.

DiCunzolo has extensive experience with the company’s structure and operations from her time as vice president of marketing and helped lead at parent company Wacoal America Inc., which Lively can leverage more.

Today, consumers desire higher-quality underwear, particularly for women. Lively’s other goal is to attract a younger demographic. The U.S. market for women’s underwear is predicted to reach $14.5 billion in 2026, up from $12.9 billion in 2021, according to market researcher Euromonitor International.

Lively understands it must abandon traditional marketing strategies to grow sales and survive in today’s competitive market. Ms. Cordeiro Grant believes Lively’s new mission is to revitalize the company’s reputation by strengthening its connection with its clients on an individual level, and that DiCunzolo’s skills as a former Marketing Executive will benefit the company.

Ms. DiCunzolo has stated that she hopes to place an emphasis on Lively’s customer interaction. While strategically adjusting to the ever-changing environment, she intends to maintain the Lively community’s centrality in decision-making, maintain the brand’s focus on its team, and preserve the brand’s vision and heart.

Image Source Business Insider

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The Ups And Downs Of A 23-Year-Old Entrepreneur As He Rides The Wave Of Success He Has Built Through Rental Arbitrage

You still have the right to hope for the best and move forward even if you face adversity just as you reach the pinnacle of your accomplishments. This 23-year-old entrepreneur is proof that hard work and determination can pay off.

Derek Cheung is a former college student who got into rental arbitrage. He was an intern when he discovered the company that operates short-term rentals for properties it doesn’t own.

In 2018, he began engaging in rent arbitrage by acquiring his first two apartments. Derek’s first steps weren’t smooth sailing. He did a lot and did extensive research to ensure he was following a solid business plan.

Derek learned the legal paperwork and communication skills involved in real estate and rent arbitrage transactions, especially since many landlords have specific preferences for working with such parties — he even went through around a hundred landlord leads.

He also made sure he knew how to service the property, maintain fixtures, decorate it, and approach landlords in negotiations. Since his first deal was with an agent who represents multiple landlords, his career took off from there.

Derek’s first annual leases were signed in February 2019. One-bedroom flats cost $1,215 per month while studios cost $999. He put down a $500 security deposit on each flat, plus the first month’s rent. Short-term rentals were permitted under the terms of his additional contract.

As a result of working part-time while in school, Derek was able to save $8,000. He also had a $5,000 credit card limit, which was sufficient at the time. He spent $5,000 on secondhand items from Facebook Marketplace. He rented U-Haul to move things and asked two friends to help. After he had set them up, he took photos of the units and posted them on Airbnb.

He kept moving forward with the strategy, and soon he was managing and cleaning six apartment blocks. He had reached a terrifying $10,000 in liability and rent expenses, but he was convinced that he had to risk money in order to make a lot.

Unfortunately, the pandemic hampered travel and bookings. At that time, he owed $20,000  in monthly expenses. He began calling builders, corporate movers, and insurance housing agencies weekly to offer his units, and advertised on Zillow, Corporate Housing by Owner, Furnished Finder, and Craigslist. His top priority was serving customers who had booked 60 days in advance.

When the pandemic subsided, he created a new plan to make up for his losses. Derek lowered his prices just enough to break even or make a small profit. He was also keen on securing long-term visitors and started taking reservations from people in the area who were in between leases, evicted from their homes, or were staying in hotels because their insurance wouldn’t cover them.

Derek had 50 properties by the end of 2021, with 44 of them being fully functional. His revenue increased by about 22% this year.

Image Source openthemagazine.com

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Director Gurinder Chadha On Shaping Her Successful Career By Celebrating Difference

“People might tell you that you’re the odd one out. Remember you’re not, you too are the mainstream. The world might try to make differences a pejorative thing, but I’ve carved out a whole career by celebrating it,” says the 62-year-old film director, Gurinder Chadha, in her recent candid interview with The Guardian.

Gurinder Chadha was born in Kenya, then a British colony. Her family was part of the Indian diaspora in East Africa. They moved to London when she was two and rented a single bedroom. She recounts being shoved into a metal bed frame by their landlord’s son. Her mother was devastated but couldn’t comfort her. “I still remember the indignity and injustice,” she adds.

For a while, she even refused to eat Indian food and had her chapatis with jam and butter. At age 10, she ran away from home and considered it an “escape” to be more British.

Gurinder considers the 2002 box-office hit ‘Bend It Like Beckham’ she directed a watershed moment. She tells The Guardian that until then, the perception was that Indian girls in the UK were obeying and submissive to strict families, but that wasn’t their experience.

“As an immigrant kid, you realise early on you and your parents live different realities,” she adds, “You can fight and rebel, or accept your parents for who they are, work around them, and get on with it. That’s what we did.”

It took three years to get the sports comedy-drama film green-lit. Everyone told her an Indian girl playing football wouldn’t attract the audience. However, it’s the only film to be released in every country since it debuted 20 years ago. “For people on the margins all over, it was transformative”

Unfortunately, her father died suddenly in 1999, and he never got to see Gurinder’s biggest achievements. This made her unappreciated her success for a long time as her father wasn’t there to share it with. It changed when she became a mother of twins in her late 40s, “Having my children celebrate my work has seen something shift within me. Finally, I’ve started to let myself believe it”