The first time Alice Shikina stepped into a Muay Thai ring, the moment felt bigger than the fight itself. The gloves were heavy, but what weighed more was everything she had been carrying in the months before.
She was in her late thirties, newly divorced, and raising two young children on her own. Her kids were just two and five years old, and the life she had carefully built no longer looked the same.
At the same time, she was trying to establish herself as a mediator and build her own business from the ground up. She didn’t know it yet, but the self-trust she was about to forge in that ring would become the foundation of how she led others through their own conflicts.
The Fight Before the Fight
Kickboxing began as a way to cope during a season that felt completely overwhelming. It gave Alice a physical outlet when her thoughts wouldn’t quiet down and her emotions felt too heavy to carry.
A few months later, Alice’s coach asked if she would consider competing. The idea unsettled her because she had never fought before and had never faced someone trained to strike back. For two months, she wrestled with the decision. What frightened her most was not losing, but the possibility of doubting herself under pressure.
When she finally committed, her routine became disciplined and demanding. She trained three hours a day, carving out time in the early mornings and late evenings while continuing to care for her children and grow her work.
The night before her first fight in Iowa, a coach told her that the real fight was already over because it happened during the grueling months of preparation. Once she realized that, her nerves calmed and a quiet steadiness took over. Even as she approached the ring to step in and fight, she felt unusually calm. She didn’t win that match, but she stayed on her feet until the final bell, and for a woman rebuilding her life, that was more than enough.
What the Ring Taught Her About Pressure
Alice went on to fight three more times. Afterwards, Alice turned her sights to competing in triathlons and even placed first in her age group at the Alcatraz Duathlon. While the medals were nice, the real reward was the quiet discipline she built through the discomfort of training.
She came to understand that fear does not simply fade with time. It softens only when you decide to move toward it.
She also learned that preparation changes how you carry yourself in difficult moments. When you put in the work, you stand differently, breathe more steadily, and think more clearly under pressure.
Today, those lessons shape how she sits with couples navigating divorce and teams facing workplace conflict. When emotions rise and conversations begin to unravel, she remains steady, drawing on the same discipline that once kept her composed in the ring.
Building Her Practice on Her Own Terms
Alice now runs Shikina Mediation and Arbitration full-time, helping divorcing couples, families, and organizations reach agreements they once thought were out of reach. Most clients come to her when communication has broken down and trust feels fragile.
Early in her career, she tried building her business by networking with attorneys, but quickly saw the bias against non-attorney mediators in a field long dominated by older white men. Instead of forcing herself into a system that did not fully welcome her, she shifted her focus to working directly with couples and workplace clients, growing her practice into a thriving full-time business over the past decade. In 2025, Alice was awarded the prestigious Raymond Shonholtz Visionary Peacemaker Award by San Francisco’s Community Boards.
Her work has expanded beyond the mediation room. She hosts the podcast, Negotiation with Alice, now over 100 episodes strong. She authored the book Negotiating with Your Kids, and continues to teach communication and conflict resolution to executives and C-Suite staff. As a second-generation Okinawan American whose parents survived the Battle of Okinawa as children, resilience runs deep in her story.
Nothing in business, she says, will ever feel as intimidating as stepping into a ring to face an unknown opponent. In that ring, she rebuilt her confidence. At the mediation table, she now helps others rebuild their lives with clarity, courage, and peace.
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