Stories

July 10, 2023

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In a world where it can be easy to feel disconnected and jaded, Serene Chan’s art is a refreshing reminder of the beauty and magic that surrounds us.

With her ability to use digital art and visual storytelling to provoke child-like wonder and capture nostalgia, Serene creates images that are not just visually stunning – but also carry a deeper message about the importance of mental health and the value of diverse cultures and communities.

Serene is a Chinese-Canadian creative and expert daydreamer who worked as a freelance traditional painter and digital illustrator for 8 years, supporting other independent musicians, writers, and artists. Alongside her art, she works full time as an accountant. Her versatile background includes her academic education in business and years of entrepreneurial experience exemplified in three of her start-up businesses.

When she’s not painting, Serene channels her artistic energy into other creative endeavors such as crafting resin crafts, thrifting, sewing, and thrift flipping.

JOURNEY TO DISCOVERING ART AS AN OUTLET

Growing up, I was extremely socially awkward and spent a lot of time in my head. I like to call myself an expert daydreamer because I spent most of my life imagining different worlds that I fit in a little bit better than this one.

When I found art as an outlet, it just made sense because it allowed me to be able to create places that defied all odds; places where stars could be captured in your hands, where dragons roam free, a place that I can call home. I was inspired by the power that all artists have- the ability to create something from nothing, especially when it doesn’t exist in the real world. 

The traditional painting came naturally to me, but my immigrant parents pressured me to conform to their ideals of what a successful individual looks like and put little emphasis on my creative passions. I followed their well-intentioned guidance and wishes for their daughter to be self-sufficient one day. I did not receive the arts education I sometimes wish I received in my 20s. I followed the motions of getting a bachelor’s in business and my accounting designation, and ended up in a corporate budgets job.

Over time, I realized that going to art school does not determine the success of an artist. If I really wanted to have an art career, I was going to make it happen regardless of whether or not I had the connections or credentials to do so.

I began my art journey in 2015, starting an art website with no idea what I was doing. I transitioned into digital illustration only 2 years ago when I finally invested in an iPad to accelerate my painting process. For the last 8 years, I spent an uncountable amount of time experimenting with different tactics to maintain a part-time art career selling prints, doing custom artwork, and applying to every open call I qualified for.

I’ve spent much of my art journey finding resources to personally develop, and reached out to countless individuals in the art industry to learn about their experiences. Ambition is what fuels my love for learning and my efforts of sharing high-quality art content with the world. Though my art career is not full-time yet, I’m still excited to continue grinding it out and seeing where it takes me.

COPING UP WITH LIFE’S CHALLENGES

My immigrant parents pressured me to assimilate with society and put little emphasis on carrying out Chinese traditions from home. So, while I became comfortable with Westernized routines, I began to feel embarrassed about my culture in my youth.

I grew up developing mental health issues from suppressing my reactions to the microaggressions around me and being unable to cope with them. As time passed, I realized that resiliency comes from releasing some of the trauma and anxiety that’s been clouding my thoughts. However, it’s also understanding that although it might never disappear, it’s a part of what makes you-you. It’s transforming into someone who is at peace with the chaos and accepts it as something that has to happen in order to grow. This is why I’m now extremely driven to teach the importance of celebrating my Asian culture and incorporating the aspect of mental health to start conversations.

One of my favorite paintings with both of these concepts is “Remembered Always.” I painted this during a time when my family was trying to navigate grief from mental health-related death. Watching my family try to recover from that trauma made me realize how death, how to grieve, and mental health rarely gets talked about in an immigrant family, especially at an early age.

Remembered Always by Serene Chan

In Chinese symbolism, cranes are often believed to carry spirits to heaven after they die. This painting depicts loss remembered by the living and hopes that their spirits are brought to a happier place. My inspiration is to educate the values and symbolism the Chinese believe in to help them ease the pain of death.

PROMOTING MENTAL WELLNESS THROUGH ART

One of the worst parts of mental health is having thoughts or feelings that you can’t control. Any form of art (drawing, writing, music, etc) can be a way to express those thoughts you have. You don’t have to be good at it, or even have any experience. Using art to convey what’s on your mind lets you manifest those feelings into something physical that you CAN control. 

I know sometimes it sounds easier than putting it into practice. Maybe your mind is drawing a blank. Maybe it’s too difficult to put into words what you’re feeling because there are no words in the dictionary that describe what you’re going through. I would recommend finding paintings, poetry, stories, or music that speaks to you. I guarantee you that there’s someone out there who has felt what you feel and was able to put it into art. Perhaps then, you’ll feel a little less alone knowing there’s someone else in this universe who understands how you feel.

Just know that your mental struggles are never too small or insignificant. You matter in this world, so please take care of yourself.

THE PAINTING PROCESS

My process requires more planning than most might think. Before I begin a painting, I focus on a feeling I want to capture. I then refer to the resources I regularly collect from the internet or everyday life. I take inspiration from different components found in my references to construct an image in my head.

After I get an idea of the scene, I create a very rough sketch and a color mock-up. About 80% of the time, I have to do in-depth research about every item I’m painting so I have a better understanding of how each component looks in the environment it’s in. This could mean understanding how the light impacts each object, understanding how the body looks in a specific pose, or even how clothes fall on the body when positioned a certain way. After all that work, then I can finally begin the fun part: painting!

I usually start with the background and paint the figures on top after. Because I did so much planning and prep work beforehand, the painting process is pretty effortless afterward. The entire process can range between 1-2 weeks. 

Usually, the painting process is done digitally on my iPad. Lately, I’ve been doing sketches in pencil on paper before taking a picture of it and continuing the sketch digitally. I find that my hand-eye coordination is better when I can feel the pencil touch paper.

SUPPORTING AND SHARING OTHER ARTISTS’ STORIES

Art is meant to be shared and to inspire each other with our individual perceptions of the world. If I have the ability to help other artists/writers/musicians further their voices by providing thought-provoking artwork that attracts people’s attention, then why not? My art business is not only meant to share my own stories and experiences but to also help others share theirs.

One of my favorite collaborations includes one with RBC and VIBE Arts, where I created two huge poster ads to be displayed in a Toronto Transit Commission Subway station in Toronto. This project was meant to promote women in art and what speaks to them as an artist. This two-panel illustration represents my present self in one painting and my discovering my past ancestry in another painting. The present self-painting depicts my safe haven- my ideal room filled with all my favorite art forms and passions. The ancestry painting depicts 6 different Chinese hidden mythologies in an alternate ancient East Asian universe. This project highlights the importance of my ancestry and how it’s deeply rooted in my identity today.

Stories That Made Me I & II by Serene Chan

Other honorable mentions include the collaborations I did with East Asian fashion and jewelry designers, such as DAWANG and Sublima Jewelry. They both focus on promoting their East Asian heritage with a modern twist, encouraging their audiences to feel beautiful and proud of being Asian while wearing their pieces. What made it extra special for me was being able to connect with other small businesses and learn about how they bring their visions to life. Being inspired by other talented artists is truly such an honor.

Chinese New Year by Serene Chan
Male Mulan & Mushu by Serene Chan

COLLABORATE WITH SERENE

I have a current collaboration with DrawaDot, where I created a piece celebrating the Lunar New Year and the concept of celebration. All proceeds of this project go toward supporting emerging artists who are striving to kick-start their art careers.

I also have a super fun collaboration with Toronto Pearson Airport coming up. So if anyone is flying to Toronto… they might just see my artwork in Arrivals in a couple of months!

My hope is that my art will inspire others to appreciate the many traditions and celebrations of Asia, and help people develop a child-like wonder everyone is capable of experiencing when viewing the world. Between just you and me, I’m in the process of illustrating a self-published book that promotes both mental health and an Asian festival.

For anyone who wants to stay updated on my work and give feedback on what they’d like to see, I encourage you to sign up for my newsletter! I send monthly updates of new art, art processes, shop updates, and painting tips/tricks. If you come along on my journey, I promise you’ll find art that helps people become daydreamers and find a sense of belonging in this world.

Website: sereneillustrations.com

Instagram: @sereneillustrations 

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Darjeeling Express Chef Asma Khan’s New Cookbook Celebrates Women and Her Ammu (Mother)

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Bald, Bold, and Beautiful: Proud Of Being Fifty-Five Walking My Truth

In the view of society, hair is connected with youthfulness and beauty in women, virility, and masculinity in men. It should come as no surprise that hair loss may make many men and women feel self-conscious. But should that be always the case?

Caroline Mangune Alanis was only 4 years old when she lost all her hair, “I don’t even know what it is like to have hair.” she said. Caroline has Alopecia Universalis (AU)  — the rarest form of Alopecia Areata, it’s an autoimmune condition that attacks the hair follicles.

Growing up Bald

Born in the Philippines to a strict father and a sweet and kind soul mother, as she describes, “My dad didn’t allow me to go out with friends a lot. I was never allowed to go on sleepovers.  He sheltered me from people. I never realized that until I was an adult, and reflected on my childhood.” She also has two brothers who were protective as well.

At the tender age of 4, she was already practicing “DAILY AFFIRMATIONS” although she never knew how impactful they were,  “I was always told to look in the front of the mirror.  I would say, I am beautiful, I am strong, I am special. I have beautiful eyes, beautiful skin, etc.”  Her parents never told her the pain and heartbreak of raising her, rather they just always told her how special and beautiful she was, “They always told me I was meant to stand out.”

She had no recollection of the time her hair started falling out, but she was told that her hair fell off within a 2-week time frame, “My mom said it could have been brought by stress from an earthquake we had in the Philippines.”  

Caroline was never allowed to say negative words about herself, or else her father would scold her. She was imparted that words she says about herself will either bring her up or tear her down, “So maybe I thought negative things about myself, but I never said it. Growing up bald, I never felt ugly, just incomplete.”

Growing up bald, I never felt ugly, just incomplete.

– Caroline Mangune Alanis

Although her parents taught her how to be courageous and had always made her feel how beautiful and blessed she was, growing up bald was not easy — she had to endure the everyday pressure of life. “There was the pressure of seeing little girls with beautiful hair and wishing every day that I had that. There was the pressure of kids being mean and pulling off my bandana and laughing at me because I was bald.” She faced the pressure of name-calling and bullying.

Caroline’s parents finally convinced her to start wearing a wig which, unfortunately, didn’t make things easier as she recalls. Walking home from school one day with her brother, a girl decided it would be fun to pull Caroline’s wig off and throw it on the ground. “At that moment, all I could do was cry and run home,” she adds, “every day I feared leaving the house, the emotional scar is unimaginable.”

She learned how to hide her AU, she felt as if people wouldn’t accept her for being her so it became a secret, and only her family and those she truly trusted, which were not many, knew the real Caroline.

In high school, only a handful knew about her AU, “which made it so easy to try to blend in since I never wanted to stand out, never!” The ironic part about it, as Caroline describes, was she would always be the one to be called by her teachers to lead a project, sing solos, and participate in plays and fashion shows. They even nominated her to join the homecoming queen and enter a beauty pageant. However, “I realized that my fear never really went away by keeping my AU a secret and the emotional scar was also still a part of my life.”

Every day I feared leaving the house, the emotional scar is unimaginable.

-Caroline Mangune Alanis

Being Bold With The Love Of Her Life

She met her husband Mark from work, where they were both managing stores at a mall in Chicago. They became best friends and were each other’s plus one at weddings, “We didn’t start dating until I transferred to another mall.” she said.    

But the day has to come when she must tell Mark about her condition, “Telling Mark about my alopecia was very difficult. He once told me that he loved hair and eyes on a woman,” she adds, “He himself has gorgeous hair.” Caroline felt she didn’t have one of the criteria Mark was looking for. Although she mentioned several times that she had something to tell him and he would always say “whenever you are ready.” Caroline thought that they both knew that Mark is aware of her wearing a wig, they just never talked about it. 

Mark and Caroline had been dating for about a year when she finally tried to tell him one evening. She got choked up and started crying. He told her, “Caroline, don’t you think I know you by now from your head down to your toes?” He had tears in his eyes. She then asked Mark why he didn’t tell her.  He replied, “I wanted you to trust me enough to tell me”.  

As they began to start their family, Caroline’s AU became their secret. She held her family bound to her alopecia. When her daughters’ were infants, she wouldn’t carry them in public for fear that they would pull her wig. “They were taught never to touch mommy’s hair, ever!” 

Her daughter could never have friends sleep over because it would be very uncomfortable for Caroline to be her in her own home. “My daughters were always fearful when we were out in public, especially on windy days.” 

Caroline’s baldness was a big secret, even her husband’s family didn’t know, “because I hid so much all my life, I didn’t realize I walked in fear every day.  I didn’t realize I lived in bondage.”

Mark told her, “Caroline, don’t you think I know you by now from your head down to your toes?” He had tears in his eyes. She then asked Mark why he didn’t tell her.  He replied, “I wanted you to trust me enough to tell me”.  

Embracing Being Beautiful

In the summer of 2015, her life opened a new door, she became a part of an International Alopecia Group on Facebook and realized that her journey with AU has prepared her to help others like her. She saw so many men and women devastated by losing their hair. They were going through a lot of emotional pain, “You see, alopecia can happen at any time in one’s life so the adults experience a loss and have to grieve.” Caroline said. Alopecia might not be life-threatening but it is life-altering. Hair, eyebrows, and lashes truly make a difference in one’s appearance, “I myself put my face on every day.” she added. 

She also saw some men and women walking proudly bald. One man, in particular, Anthony Carrigan, an actor who also kept his alopecia a secret but he came out and had been helping others and is a beacon of light.  

Then, Caroline started giving advice about doing daily affirmations, “doing lots of SELF LOVE!”  as well as giving makeup tips, the alopecia community knows her as the “Eyelash Queen”.

But once the parents of alopecia children started posting their heartbreaks, “that’s when I realized my parents’ challenges of raising me, a bald child.” Caroline started reiterating what her parents taught her. She gave advice to parents, about how special their child was, how they were perfect and beautiful just as they were. “Alopecia children are so strong,” she noted.

“I then realized I was all those things: perfect, beautiful, and strong,” she said, but her baldness was still a secret. Caroline thought to herself, how does she encourage others to accept themselves if she herself could not let people know about her condition? So as those thoughts lingered in her head, she began telling her family and friends — she only wanted to tell people, not show people. Her goal was to have 30 different wigs for each day of the month.

“But God! God had other plans for me,” the unexplainable started occurring, her wigs became unbearably uncomfortable to wear, “it almost felt like my scalp was burning,” which she thought was completely strange since she has been wearing them for 40 years. It took a lot to take a look at herself bald.  She then began to think, “How can I tell my daughters  and others that beauty really lies deep within if I myself can’t see past my lack of hair?”

On August 14, 2015, on her way home with her husband from dinner, Caroline’s wig was getting itchy so she took it off to scratch her head. She was about to put her wig back on but Mark held her hand to stop her. He said “Honey, don’t put it on, you’re fine. You are safe with me, nothing can hurt you, and no one will hurt you. You are beautiful.” She reluctantly did what he asked and wanted to be strong for him. 

Mark kept holding her hand tight and kept asking if she was okay,  “I just kept saying it is scary.”  As they were nearing their home, her husband pulled over and said “Come on let’s take a selfie.” to lighten the situation. Her husband dropped Caroline off in front of their home, with her wig in her purse. Mark told her to go ahead and go into their home.  

“For the first time in 40  years, I felt God’s love on my head. The soft wind touched my head, a few raindrops falling on my head. I cried and laughed as I ran to my house.” she recalls.  

After that night, her husband helped Caroline with her small steps into seeing herself for who she was — a beautiful woman living with AU. Slowly, she found herself no longer wearing her wigs. They would go on drives and take walks on the beach. “I felt free, my secret slowly fading; including the emotional scar.”

I felt free, my secret slowly fading; including the emotional scar.

-Caroline Mangune Alanis

“On Sept 9, 2015, I posted it on Facebook, I cried the whole night.  Everyone was so kind.  I was still afraid, but I started walking bald.” she expressed.

In the fall of that year, it started getting cold and she didn’t like her hats since they looked terrible without any hair. She was pretty sad because she really did not want to start wearing her wigs again, “I just prayed and asked God to lead me in what I am supposed to do. I got my answer on Sunday, October 4th,” A lady stopped her and asked if she has Alopecia, to which she responded “Yes!”. The woman said, so did she, and asked Caroline, how does she do it? — She knew the lady meant how she could walk around without her wig.

Caroline answered “I don’t know. This is all new to me. “God is giving me the strength to do this. I couldn’t have done this on my own.” So that day, she officially retired all her wigs. “Yes, I put them all away for those special occasions,” she added.

She has met so many people just like her all over the world which inspired her to start her own Alopecia Group in Chicago, where they meet once a month. “I love having a family I call my own, people who truly understand me.”

The Chicago Alopecians

Caroline together with her friends started the Facebook group, with her as the main facilitator. It is a place where they can share their personal journeys and ask for advice or help. The Chicago Alopecians’ mission is to ensure that no one feels alone. Recently, they have been planning to create more events to cater to everyone, children, teens, and men. 

“We each have our own alopecia journey and we just want to connect with each other,” said Caroline. They also allow wig vendors in the group, “Chicagoland is such a big place. I love having a solution for everyone in the group.” As of writing, they currently have 332 members, and they’ve also started an Instagram page to widen their reach.

For the international group, Caroline is also encouraging others to create their own alopecia groups — their own tribe in their local towns.

“I have always known God wanted me to stand out, but I was always afraid.  These days, I am no longer afraid to not have my wig on, I embrace it.”

Caroline is truly a woman who is defying what society calls “beautiful”.